Happy Birthday, My Dear Son!

It is so hard to believe my mothering journey started 8 years ago today! When Jay and I were first married (or probably before) we talked about waiting 5 years to have kids. After 3 years, I was just itching to be a mom! Now, you must know that being a mom was my biggest dream - it was everything I aspired to be! So waiting three years was a long time! :) I didn't want to force Jay into anything that he wasn't ready for so, though I told him I was ready at that point, I didn't force the issue. Then, bless his kind and sweet and gracious spirit, a little while later he told me I didn't need to renew my birthcontrol pills - his way of saying we could start to try having a baby. And, to top it off, he didn't even make me finish the unopened package I already paid for, a big surprise for my very money-conscious hubby! Anyhow, shortly after we were pregnant! I had suspicions I was with child so I bought a home pregnancy test and used it in the bathroom of the mall! Classy, isn't it! When I saw the two lines indicating my dreams had come true, I couldn't stop smiling! I went to my inlaws house (that's where Jay was) and he came out to the car to see me. I told him "1 means 'no', 2 means 'yes'." He had no clue what I was talking about. I said it again and then held up the stick! He clued in fairly quickly and was just thrilled with the idea! He knew that his first reaction would be remembered by me so he made sure it was positive! So, that was the beginning of the mothering journey for me. 8ish months later, I delivered our son into the hands of my husband in the warmth and coziness of our bedroom. Besides his initial cry, my dear son was sooooo quiet. He was absolutely content to be held by his daddy while the midwives finished up with me. He had the largest brown eyes and such a quiet spirit. I remember him really crying for the first time that night (he was born in the morning) and I was confused as to who was crying - until I remembered I was a mom and that was my son!

When I held him in my arms for the first time, I had this overwhelming sense that this . . . THIS was what I was created for. This was my purpose! It was a fulfillment of my dreams and it was even better than I could have imagined. I still, 8 years later, wonder when the reality of being a mom will sink in. I am surprised and overwhelmed over and over at the blessing of these children and it all started with my not-so-little-anymore son, Pepe! He has such a gentle spirit (he is still boy and can roughhouse like one!), loves his siblings and shows great tenderness towards them, is responsible, smart, a huge helper, a fantastic reader, is loving and has a love for Jesus that is wonderful to see. He is methodical in his choices, taking much time to think things through, he is hesitant in new surroundings, checking it all out to make sure it is safe. He has such a special place in my heart (as do each of his siblings) and I cannot imagine this family without him.

Pepe, I love you, my sweet 8-year old son, and I am humbled that the Lord allowed me to be your mother. I look forward to the next 8 years and many, many more beyond that! Happy Birthday, son!